Single and Searching Read online

  Chapter 10

  She'd given him her heart.

  Her body.

  Her soul.

  But Gabe didn't love her. He had only used her to further his career.

  Casey blinked back tears as recent conversations echoed in her mind: conversations about his work, the investigation, conversations where he'd had every opportunity possible to tell her his suspicions. No, instead, he'd sneaked behind her back. He'd romanced her, sent her gifts, and seduced her—all for a story.

  "Casey?" Gabe moved toward her, but Casey shrank back in the chair, steeling herself against the emotions clouding his eyes. What was he doing? Feeling guilty now that he'd cornered her?

  Well, good for him. He should feel guilty. She'd given him her love, and he'd stomped on it.

  "Thornton, what were you doing holding out?" Lieutenant Harper demanded. "I forget sometimes you're a damn reporter. You wanted the whole scoop before you filled me in, didn't you?"

  Gabe ran a hand through his hair, never once taking his eyes off of Casey. Casey straightened her shoulders and met his look with cool eyes.

  "I told you there was no need to question her," Gabe said. "She's too disorganized and messy to be a calculated thief."

  Casey's hurt subsided for a split second and she fumed. "Messy? At least I don't separate my vegetables."

  "I don't do that anymore," Gabe argued. "I've been practicing."

  Casey crossed her arms, barely resisting the urge to slap him.

  Harper waved his hands. "Listen, I don't know what the two of you are jabbering about, but I'm trying to catch a thief."

  "So am I." Gabe punched the photos with one finger. "Have the lab analyze these photographs. They've been doctored. "

  Casey closed her eyes as his words sank in. Damn him. It was about the story for him. Maybe this would win him his Pulitzer.

  Lieutenant Harper slammed his hand on the table. "Thornton, what's going on? You know Miss McIntyre was arrested for stealing when she was a juvenile. She's using an alias now, and she adopted a child in an attempt to gain access to the woman's trust fund."

  Casey's heart pounded. "That's not true," she said, her breath catching as hurt stabbed her. "I love that little boy more than anything in the world. His mother was my friend and I promised to take care of him. I don't care about the money."

  Gabe's eyes seemed to be searching her face, and for some odd reason, she swore he looked hurt.

  "I told you, Casey had nothing to do with the robberies, Lieutenant, and I'm close to uncovering the truth."

  The lieutenant held up a silk scarf. "This scarf has her fingerprints all over it."

  Casey gasped. "I've been looking for that—-"

  "Be quiet, Casey," Gabe ordered.

  Casey glared at him.

  "Where did you find that?" Gabe asked.

  "The last house that was robbed. It has two sets of prints on it. Yours and hers."

  The room spun around Casey. Somewhere in the background, she heard Gabe talking about her house being broken into, about teenagers and a set-up, but nothing made sense. If he didn't already know all the details of her past, Lieutenant Harper would fill him in.

  A fog of hurt and shame enveloped her. Memories of the last few days, of her giving herself to Gabe, of admitting to Jenna and Jill that she was in love with him and almost admitting it to him, flashed through her mind.

  What a fool she'd been.

  "You know I can hold her for twenty-four hours for questioning," Lieutenant Harper said.

  They were going to put her in jail. What would happen to Henry S.? Panic made Casey turn to Gabe. His frown sent her pulse racing. He was staring at her once again with that guarded expression. Did he believe she was guilty? Was he going to help her or help put her away?

  "That won't be necessary," Gabe said. "You can release her into my custody."

  Casey's chest constricted. After what he'd done, did he really expect her to go with him?

  "I don't know." Harper shook his head, his dark eyes assessing Casey. "You don't seem very objective on this matter."

  "Harper, you've known me a long time. You know I don't let my personal feelings interfere with my work."

  Casey let out a harsh breath. Now, he'd said it, she had to accept it. Still, hearing Gabe admit that he'd used her sent a sharp pain through her.

  Harper rapped his knuckles on the table. "Okay, you've got forty-eight hours. I want to hear something by then." Harper motioned toward Casey. "You're free to go with Thornton, Ms. McIntyre, but don't leave the area."

  Casey wiped her sweaty palms on her skirt and stood. In a daze, she walked out the door, and outside, knowing in the recesses of her mind that Gabe silently followed her.

  "Come on, Casey, I'll drive you," Gabe said.

  Casey shook her head, her voice brittle. "I'm calling Jenna."

  Gabe grabbed her arm and steered her toward his SUV. "The hell you are. You're going with me."

  "Let go of me!" Casey swung around and jerked her arm free, her body shuddering. "Oh, that's right. I'm in your custody now. Sleeping with me and humiliating me wasn't enough for you, was it? What are you going to do now? Handcuff me to your bed hoping I'll give you more ammunition to use against me?"

  "Casey, don't," Gabe said, his voice husky. "Please let me explain."

  Casey stabbed his chest with one finger. "Don't ever touch me again. You may get your story out of this, but don't expect me to give you anything else." She climbed into his SUV, fastened her seatbelt and clenched her hands in her lap. Numbness began to settle around her, driving the pain deep inside.

  "Now take me home. Then, I want you out of my life."

  Gabe shoved his hands in his pockets, his eyes flickering with hurt and disappointment. But she forced herself to ignore it. Why should he be hurt?

  He was the one who had betrayed her.

  Sliding as far across the seat as possible, she wrapped her arms around herself in an attempt to hold herself together. She refused to cry in front of him.

  * * *

  He loved her with all his heart.

  He'd wanted to protect her.

  But instead he'd hurt her badly.

  He struggled for the words to make things right, to breach the distance between them. But she seemed to build walls with each mile, almost visibly sinking behind them.

  "I know this looks bad, Casey, but I do care about you," Gabe said quietly. But instead of answering, she shrank deeper into her silence.

  Dammit. Somehow he had to make her listen and understand. He couldn't lose her.

  "I should have told you about the investigation," he added quietly, "about the description and all, but I wanted to protect you."

  That got a reaction. Casey glared at him with hate-filled eyes.

  Gabe's voice rose. "You may not believe it, but it's true. I did talk to Harper about your ad, but that was before I met you. Once we met, I told him you didn't have anything to do with the robberies."

  "You investigated me."

  Casey's accusation stung. How could he explain when the distrust in her eyes shook him to the core?

  Gabe's hands tightened on the steering wheel. "I was trying to help you, dammit."

  "Help me?" Casey laughed bitterly, then glanced away, huddling within herself again. "You mean help the poor virgin out by teaching her about sex before you sent her to jail?"

  He ground his teeth. "It was more than sex and you know it, Casey."

  Casey sighed. "I don't want to hear any more of your lies."

  She was shutting him out. He was afraid nothing he could say would reach her.

  "Well, you're damn well going to hear more," Gabe finally said. He'd come too far with Casey to quit now.

  She stared out the window, but anger and fear won over, and he swerved the car to the side of the road and screeched to a stop.

  Casey reached for the door handle to bolt, but he grabbed her hands. "No, sweetheart, you're going to listen to me whether you like it or not." Wit
h every ounce of restraint he could find, he lowered his voice. "I know you're hurt and angry and you think I used you, but you're wrong. I'm in love with you."

  "Don't," Casey whispered in a raw voice. "Don't lie to me anymore. "

  The shattered look on her face and disbelief in her eyes made his lungs squeeze for air. He tried to take her in his arms, but she struggled away.

  "When I heard the description the witness gave, I thought someone was setting you up," he said desperate to make her understand. "I wanted to find the real thief without you ever knowing because I didn't want you to be hurt."

  "It's too late for that," Casey said, turning away from him.

  "Sweetheart, please listen to me. It's not too late." Gabe hated the pleading in his voice, but he couldn't help himself. "We have something special between us. You know that. You can't just throw it away."

  Casey's voice quivered. "Just stop. There's no need to play games anymore."

  Gabe clenched his hands into fists. "I'm not playing games. I never was. I told you the truth. You're the one who doesn't trust me. You never did, did you? If you had, you would have told me about your record and your real name."

  Casey closed her eyes as tears filled them.

  "Why didn't you tell me?"

  "You're wrong. I did trust you." Casey took a deep breath. "You're the only person I've ever told about my stepfather, the only man I've ever been with. And you used that, you made a fool out of me."

  "That's not true."

  "Yes it is. I saw that list on your refrigerator, the qualities you wanted in a woman. I completely failed that list."

  "That list was stupid," Gabe said. "I made it long before I met you, and when I did, I realized how idiotic it was." Gabe scrubbed a hand over his face. "Besides, you didn't trust me or you would have told me about your juvenile record. And I would have understood, Casey," Gabe said in a low voice.

  Casey swiped at a tear and glanced out the window. Several long, tense seconds passed. When she spoke, her words were barely more than a whisper. "How? How could you understand what it's like to feel ashamed?"

  Gabe wrestled for control. He wanted to hold her and comfort her so badly he ached.

  She continued in a monotone as she stared out the window. "Okay, you want to know, I'll tell you. When I ran away, I didn't immediately go into the group home. I lived on the streets, downtown in an old, abandoned warehouse with several homeless people. I met Jill there. We were arrested together. At fourteen, we were stealing food."

  Gabe fought the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't stand the image forming in his mind. How had Casey survived and turned into such an incredible, loving woman?

  By her own strength. It was the only answer. His admiration and love for her grew ever deeper. If only she could love him back.

  But she didn't. She hated him. He could see it in her eyes.

  "I decided to use McIntyre as a pen name," Casey added. "I was trying to make a new life, create a new image. I wanted Henry S. to grow up without any stigma attached to us. McIntyre was the name of an elderly couple I stayed with for a while. The man got sick, so I had to leave, but they were good to me."

  He watched her swipe at the tears she could no longer hold at bay and reached for her. "Casey, please. I promise I'll make things right."

  Casey shook her head, throwing her hands in the air as if dismissing any hope. Her voice grew quiet. "You can't. Now, please take me home. Because of you, because of all this, I might lose Henry S."

  Gabe cursed. "I promise you, sweetheart, you won't lose him."

  But if Casey heard him, she didn't acknowledge it. She'd already turned to the window and closed her eyes, effectively shutting him out.

  Frustrated and furious, Gabe started the car. The rest of the ride lapsed in silence. When they reached Casey's, she raced into her house without glancing back. Gabe followed, a tight ache in his chest.

  His relationship with Casey couldn't be over, he wouldn't let it be. He remembered the first time he'd climbed the steps to her porch and every moment that had happened since. There was no way he could lose her.

  He paused at the door when he realized she was already on the phone.

  "Yes, Jenna. Please bring Henry S. home. I don't know how much time I have, and I want to spend every minute with him."

  Gabe swallowed against the emotions clogging his throat. Casey really thought she was going to jail. Had she lost all faith in him?

  A steely glint flashed in her eyes as she turned to him. "So, how does this work? I've never been in custody before."

  "Casey, don't."

  She shrugged. "You can take the couch tonight. As far as today, I guess you'll want to search my house for stolen goods while Henry S. and I play together."

  "Casey, stop it."

  Emotions clouded her eyes, then she backed away from him, ran into her room and locked the door behind her.

  Gabe stood immobile, damning the circumstances that had brought them to this point.

  He'd failed with Casey, but he wasn't a failure at his job. He had to find the real thief.

  He'd made one promise he intended to keep, even if it killed him—Casey would not lose Henry S.

  * * *

  Desperate to escape Gabe and his lies, and his sexy voice, and the realization that she wanted to believe him when he'd already broken her heart, Casey flung off her clothes and rushed into the shower. She turned the water up full force, stepped inside and began to sob.

  Great heaving sobs that spent her frustration and fear and hurt. Great sobs that made her wish for Gabe's comforting arms again.

  Damn him. She wanted to hate him, but flashes of his dimple and his teasing smile and memories of his hands and body bringing her pleasure tormented her.

  Finally when the hot water waned, she flipped off the nozzle, dried off and wrapped herself up in her thick terry cloth robe.

  But even her robe reminded her of the first time she'd met Gabe. Drat. She'd probably have to burn it.

  Steeling herself against his charm, she finally combed her wet hair and headed into the kitchen. A hot cup of tea might help.

  Maybe a hot cup of tea with lemon and honey. And bourbon. Yes, a shot of that might soothe her nerves.

  But as soon as she left her room, she was struck by the sudden silence. And when she stepped into the kitchen, she found a note Gabe had stuck on the refrigerator with one of her magnetic alphabet letters.

  Dear Casey,

  I meant it when I said I love you. I'll find a way to prove it to you. I promise you that you won't lose Henry S. I'm leaving you alone because I trust you. I hope one day you'll be able to trust me, too. Please try to remember the oak tree.

  Love, Gabe

  Casey ripped the note into pieces. Then, for reasons she didn't understand, she taped it back together and hid it in her drawer.

  Heaven help her. She should hate Gabe.

  So, why did she remember the precious moments they'd shared and wonder if he was telling her the truth? Why did she want to have him hold her and utter nonsense words reassuring her that everything would be all right?

  The doorbell rang and seconds later, Jenna and Jill raced in. Henry S. gave her a big hug and a sloppy kiss and Casey held him, terrified he'd be ripped from her arms any minute.

  It doesn't matter how much you want Gabe. You're in too big a mess to think about love problems. You have to think about your son.

  "I can't believe it," Jenna said.

  Henry S. wiggled down to chase Dog.

  Sadness tinged Jill's eyes. "You really think they might arrest you?"

  Casey nodded. "That Lieutenant gave Gabe forty-eight hours to break the story. I don't know if his cops are even looking anywhere but me. And right now, I can't be sure whose side Gabe is on."

  Jenna patted Casey's back. "It'll work out, Casey. You know we're here for you."

  Maybe it would work out, maybe not. "Thanks. But if social services takes Henry S., no telling what could happe
n to him. They could put him back in foster care or... with Travis. "The thought made her sick to her stomach.

  Jenna and Jill embraced her, and she accepted her friends' comfort, pushing thoughts of Gabe's warm arms aside.

  Still, she was terrified for her son.

  "Wuv Mommy," Henry S. said, squeezing between them. Casey scooped him into her arms and hugged him.

  "I love you, too, buddy."

  "Forget about Gabe Thornton," Jill whispered.

  Henry S. patted Casey's damp cheeks, and Casey laughed. "I will. Who needs men anyway?" But she was telling the biggest lie ever.

  More than anything, she needed Gabe.

  * * *

  He hadn't slept. He couldn't eat.

  He was so lonely he'd started talking to himself.

  Gabe worked around the clock. Being in his big silent house was torture. When had the silence started to feel so dismal? He knew the answer without having to even think about it.

  Casey's chaotic home, her lively toddler, and her exuberant personality had made him feel alive again. He missed the toys, he missed the clutter, the painted pasta on the walls. He even missed her messy, monster dog.

  After talking to the teenagers, he contacted Quickchange. They set up a stakeout at the drop point where the boys met their boss. The address George had given him turned out to be an abandoned building. Soon, they would have the real ringleader in custody. Now, if he could only figure out why they'd implicated Casey. It was a piece that didn't fit.

  He checked his watch. Time was running out. He had to hurry.

  * * *

  Casey opened the door, accepted the package and set it next to the other three unopened ones.

  Gabe had continued sending gifts and notes of love, but she hadn't opened them. Lieutenant Harper hadn't called, and her precious son was driving her crazy.

  He had used his tomahawk to chop their "R" project, raisin roads, into craters. Then he'd played Tarzan wearing nothing but the baseball cap Gabe had bought him. She wanted to throw the cap away, but Henry S. had taken to sleeping with it.

  The cap reminded her of the first time she and Gabe had made love and her heart cracked another notch.

  "Henry S., let's work on the letter T. We can build toothpick towers."